Having lived up to this stage of life, there are things that I have come to understand, and things that I have yet to, or refuse to understand.
I understand that people with ability will eventually come to realize their own worth and know what is best for them. They will work for people who truely appreciate them and be happy, which they deserve to be. And when they think of the past days when everything was a nightmare, they can laugh it off with a casual wave of the hand, be confidently happy and not be perplexed anymore. That was an amazing sight to see everyone of us last evening, all of us who suffered under the same source of evil and who have all left for good one after the other, bound by the same fate or perhaps out of a feeling of commradeship, gathered together again, yet so happy and so free. The sarcastic thing is, everyone has a better life after that. What I do not understand is, why someone can be so obstinate as to not see the obvious.
Having been involved in a few failed collaborations, I fully understand the difficulties of a collaboration, especially one that involves all walks of life, and a few different parties of interest. That was why I stressed the importance of a chief editor, and made suggestions when I could. Even though I had very little interest in this project, I still did not want it to be a disaster. After all my name would be in it. And when that problem appeared, I began to realize it was actually more problematic than I had thought. Now I have totally lost interest in it, I would rather they take out all my writings and not include my name at all. What I do not understand is, why they can pretend to be liberal and open and everything that respects creativity etc while they are just the exact opposite. And they suppose everyone will be taken in. What an insult to my intellect.
I understand that people have problems with other people, and that often happens in a workplace. Sometimes these things can get very complicated, and I often stay away from it as best I could, since I would rather spend all my efforts in my own work than be involved in politics. In fact I think most of us do not like politics, or claim not to. So what I do not understand is why there is still so much politics around. Somehow I begin to wonder whether I have chosen the correct role to play, though I have to admit that I am flattered to be liked generally. That may not in fact be the easiest one to play.