In retrospect

by suu4leaf

I have no desire to relate my work here, since I still wish to maintain a clear distinction between my public and private lives. But if anything, I would say it was OK.

I reflected on the last 12 months because it was 12 months ago when I began this and 12 months hence notes its fulfillment. It is only natural that I should think back, if I am to go on the next 12 months. Why should I be blamed for thinking back? Is that truly unnecessary?

I think the most unpleasant feeling for me is being wronged. As in being treated unfairly, being blamed for some wrong you have the least intention to do, feeling that you deserve better. Those tears were sour, they attack you when you least expect them. But this can be easily be compensated by the gratification of genuine admiration and approval.

I cannot stop thinking back because I still have a feeling that I deserve better.