Good Friday in Black

by suu4leaf

Today is Good Friday, the day of Sacrifice and Forgiveness, and I guess I should not, as I oftentimes do, encourage my negative emotions here, though I really feel as such today.

Perhaps I should say something happy. Today I went to the Cultural Centre for a HKIFF programme – Cashback. This is not a familiar word in Hong Kong yet, and I guess the crowd who came for the film were mainly attracted by its description as the “Male version Amelie“; but in fact if you are a citizen in London, where the film is set in, Cashback is a word so ordinary that you simply do not even realize that the word did not exist a decade ago. Back when I was in London, when I first heard that word addressed to me, I was a bit confused but took no time grasping its meaning. Afterwards whenever I went to Sainsbury I knew to say, “20 pounds please” when the cashier asked me, “Any cashback?”

The film is interesting, tinged with a bit of sadness – in this it resembles Amelie. The fun bits are real fun – in the British way, meaning not vulgar like the American, but sophisticated. But the sad bits are real sad. Now I think of it, it feels very much like The Science of Sleep. That kind of sentiment – a sensitive boy, love sick and things like that. The climax was when I realized that Sainsbury was exactly the same one I used to go shopping during my stay in London! I thought it looked very familiar to me, but then it was really the Whitechapel Sainsbury! The one with the petrol station and car park in the front! I can still recall the time when I walked past the petrol station and the car park, got to the entrance, pushed one pound into the slid to get a cart, pulled with skill (because the carts were real big old monsters) through the automatic doors, and started with fruits and vegetables. I felt so overwhelmed when the truth was revealed to me. I really missed those days, walking through the chilly air of winter London to and fro Sainsbury, got my grocery and 20 pounds cashback in an hour or so of careful shopping, every once a week.

Another thing which made me slightly happier, was the 2 new one-pieces I got before the screening. One white and one black. I realize that whenever I am in a melancholic mood, I go monochrome, with more black.

And so, me in black in the black fitting room, in a black mood.

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