À la recherche du temps perdu

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Month: January, 2007

很靈啊

很有趣……我的聖心師姐,《喝一口恆河水》的作者,叫徐岱靈。跟我的名字竟然是相同的靈字。難道名字有「靈」的都會寫書的?不過師姐比我厲害多就是了。

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果然是享受過程多於成果的&#20

今天出發去看《Marie Antoinette》時,才猛地想起今天正是前老板詩集慈善義賣的日子;他還再三邀我去的,我竟然可以忘記得一乾二淨。說到底那詩集起碼有一半是我的作品-英文的部份是我譯的,再怎麼說也應該會興奮一點吧。但就好像是把譯好的詩交給前老板的那天起,我就開始把這差不多上萬字的詩集給淡忘了。Bell曾說我是享受過程多於成果的人,那時我還不太相信的;現在《91a》和《秘笈》(詩集的名字)都完成並推出市面了,我就開始相信了-當我獨自在熱血沸騰的時候,他人因為看不到實質的東西而感到不解甚至是可笑;而當他人看到真的有成果了並認為應當為成果慶祝的時候,我卻是感覺非常的疏離。好像當創作的過程完結了便所有都回歸原本,我又再一無所有了。所以我要不住的找尋新的意義;在別人還在為我很久以前的努力的成果興奮不已的時候。

A Feast of Glamourous Abandonment

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Sofia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette – a genuine feast of glamourous abandonment. Despite the Rock ‘n’ Roll background music this is a rather quiet film: slow, down-to-earth, in big contrast to all the glamourous settings and costumes. Kirsten Dunst as Marie Antoinette, portrayed by Sofia Coppola, is a young helpless Austrian princess traded off to the court of Versailles and who in her own way survives among all the intrigues of the court of Louis XV during the instable era of the revolutions. It is a woman’s film, it does not attempt to answer the big historical questions, slightly passing off the famous “Why not eat cake?” quotation, but deals carefully with the inner life of the young Queen hidden behind the facade of Versailles.

It is great to see the Versailles again after my visit to it the summer before the last. It feels wonderful to know where I am when the scene changes – as if I really dwell with this Queen in this biggest palace in Europe. And yet the film’s greatest impact for me is the CLOTHES. Satins, laces, ribbons, hats, feathers, fans, slippers… in Rococco pale blue, pink, white, enbroidered floral patterns… I am all fetish! I really love the Rococco and her blonde aristocratic women with pale complexions, buried in laces and ribbons of baby blue and pink, who faint away frequently because the corsets make them literally breathless.




PS A little anecdote: a portrait of the real Marie Antoinette.

ducreux001

一色-In Monochrome

(其實我不打算去看NANA2,也不喜歡Glay替她寫的這首歌。)

聖誕時因為閉關寫作,幾乎都沒有外出購物。現在趁減價期間,一口氣買了一批東西:長靴、短褲、長褸、cardigan、one-piece。其實我的shopping list上還有很多未完成的項目,但已入手的全都是very good buy,所以也很滿意。

回到家把東西攤出來一看,竟發然我買的全都是Monochrome的:長靴長褸和one-piece都是黑的,而短褲和cardigan都是灰的。雖然說今季流行黑,但我想那不是主因。對於衣服的選擇,我總是有自己的原因。

以前我總是很怕黑白色的衣服,太單調同時又太強力了。不同的時候我偏好過桃紅淡粉紅海軍藍蘋果綠藍綠鮮黃白粉藍dot柄碎花懷舊花紋。但大概年紀真的大了,開始對很多顏色退避三舍;反而漸漸喜歡黑調子,欣賞不同色系不同布料剪裁配搭的黑色的玩味,喜歡所謂的Mod-look。一開始買黑白灰衣服,立刻就知道這種打扮的好處了:沒有撞色的問題,配衣服不像以前般苦惱了。有趣的是把我新入手的東西放在一起,竟然就是一個look了!其實不是刻意的,只不過潛意識我已為自己決定了要甚麼樣的配件了。我果然是一個很知道自己想要甚麼的理性shopper呀。主調是黑白灰,再加一點點其他色系的作點綴,就已很精彩了。這樣子上班也方便些;即使忽然要上外國記者會之類的高級地方開會時也不會有發現自己身穿着過份cutie衣服的尷尬,同時看上去依然年少輕狂,哈哈。

衣着,尤其是顏色,其實也反映了我當刻的心情性格。一色,就是看上去平淡,只待細細品嘗當中趣味;很深沉很拒人千里,但又很loud很high-profile的感覺吧。

等待着,懂得欣賞一色/Monochrome的人。

Review on Geling Yan’s The Uninvited

My book review on Geling Yan’s The Uninvited:

http://www.asianreviewofbooks.com/arb/article.php?article=752

Babel

Babel



The Holy Bible: King James Version. 2000.

The First Book of Moses, Called
Genesis
11

The Tower of Babel
1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech.
2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.
3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them thoroughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for mortar.
4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city, and a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.
5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded.
6 And the LORD said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.
7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.
8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.
9 Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth.

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Two of my favourite studies of the Tower of Babel by Brugel.


The Tower of Babel – a fascinating story from the Genesis. Why did God do that? In the early texts of the Genesis, there was no mention of man’s sinning. Even in this King James Bible version (17th century, best English Bible!) God’s motive is ambivalent. The Puritants decided it was for man’s pride that the punishment was given. But is it really our pride? Or is it purely God’s unaccountable wrath? But anyway, that explains how humankind never understand each other. Babel – a story about failures in communication.


I tried to convey how much I needed you, but you never understood.
I said I would have nothing to do with you, and you thought I was making a joke.
We spoke the same language, and we never spoke the same language.

想起一個以前的理念

我忽然覺得我應該在那些原材料未永遠失去前,認真去寫那個題材。

Ins For Me (Watching Project Runway Season 3)

今早鬧鐘響時,眼睛仍在痛-通常睡一晚就會好的,但今次情況比較差-而且又是俗語所說的周身唔聚財,結果雖然答應了卻沒有去幫Joey賣旗,又沒有去晚上P2的壘球練習(亦間接令隊友少了一支球棒練習),真是非常抱歉。睡了一天,啥都沒做,只有看電視。今天,是休養生息的一天。

那些美國Reality Show,除了Queer Eye For the Straight Guy,我也喜歡看America’s Next Top Model和Project Runway。很明顯我是喜歡看漂亮的東西而已,所以我討厭看The Apprentice(真的很討厭Donald Trump,真是相由心生的)。Pearl 在播Project Runway Season 3,星期六晚在家的話也一定會看。雖然不喜歡Heidi Klum每次裝模作樣的”In the world of Fashion, one day you are in, the next day you are out”,但每一季總有一些很有性格的設計師,令我每次都祈求他們不要被那些保守悶蛋評判Out掉。只是這樣也很緊張呢。所以,我也很想在此說說我心目中的Project Runway Season 3的”Ins”-


My Ins for Season 3:


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Jeffrey Sebelia

我頗喜歡Jeffrey的。喜歡他那種Skinny的Body Shape,Mix&Match和Layering。有點像上一季Daniel的身型但因為他的style是Rock ‘n’ Roll,所以對我來說更有性格更加吸引。就像他所說的The God was drunk,我也不相信他竟然要待到第8集才勝出第一次。他是參賽者中少數有意念而又真能將之實踐的designer。他的design label,Cosa Nostra原來在香港的Lane Crawford和Harvey Nichols有在 賣!但相信這一季做完後,他的label便會大大升值了。

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Jeffrey Sebelia
http://www.cosanostrainc.com/



PR3_designer_keith
Keith Michael

對Keith的第一印象是Jude Law!雖然我也會偏心長得好看的人,但Keith卻是人如其設計,他的衣服都很精彩。如果他不是因為犯規而被取消資格,我相信他一定會是Final 3。這真是Season 3的一個大遺憾呢。他被請走的那一集,真的令我非常失落。只有寄望Jeffrey和Alison了(又剛好他們三人在那集是同一組;我果然是偏好某一種style的)。

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Keith Michael
http://www.keithmichaeldesign.com/



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Alison Kelly

其實Alison在這一季並不特別出眾,但我打一開始便喜歡上這個不像普通美國女生的她了。果然她是有一點北歐血統的,而且打扮也很有歐洲味。我就是喜歡這種女生。而她能跟被眾人認為難以相處的Jeffrey成為好友,也證明她不是一般悶蛋。隊長Keith被取消資格,她的落淚和默默堅持完成比賽,令我對她更生好感。不過她性格上也許少了一點Jeffrey的強悍,所以要走也是無可避免的吧。

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Alison Kelly
http://www.alisonkellyny.com/



這一季多了很多Crossover,令比賽頓時多了一點火花:

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Jeffrey x Alison

只能說他們二人真的很合拍。但是美國小姐不喜歡這種style,也罷!我喜歡。



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Keith x Jeffrey x Alison

無話可說。最強的組合。 完全不明白為何會敗給另一組。那些評判是笨蛋!我十級喜歡這套衣服!賣給我吧!



遅些再說前兩季的Project Runway。

Stepping out of one’s safe zone

Today I had a training session with one of my bosses. This amiable Australian woman is a public relations consultant and has an office in Central with a very pretty view overlooking the Government House and the Peak beyond, and it just makes me dizzy thinking that I am having this training session for free while the CEOs from international business firms actually pay for the professional advice of my boss, who has been in the field for 20 years now.

Would anyone ever think of me as a speaker? Even I dare not think such an outrageous thing. Speaking makes me nervous. It makes me feel that I am giving away myself, which is mostly unflattering, and hearing my own voice is hideous. And if I keep silent, and represent myself only with written words, I would awe others with the partial image of myself as a fine writer while keeping the imperfect part of me away from others’ scrutiny. I have drawn myself a chalk circle and stayed within rather comfortably. As time goes by people begin to take it for granted that I do not speak, and I am planted even more firmly into my safe zone.

There were some changes after I became a hotungnian. As a freshman I was compelled to shout, cheer and sing before people. As a member of the Students’ Association I was required to stand before people and address people in an official manner. As a Senior I was entitled to lecture and patronize. But still I have one foot within the safe zone and I would not hazard anything more than is necessary. Well, at least I could shout a cheer out loud before people, which was already a very big leap forward.  

I thought I was doing fine, and I never thought I would want to be someone who can speak comfortably with almost any person and give excellent talks on stage before crowds of people. I did not know, when they offered me this job, they were actually looking forward to a day when I would become a very presentable representative, knowledgable as well as sociable, who would be an important contributor to the Prize instead of just an ordinary clerk taking care of petty affairs. They are trying to lift me entirely out of my safe zone and transform me.

There is always reluctance to leave one’s safe zone – but then what have I to lose? Perhaps some embarassments and unpleasantness along the way – but when my transformation is complete, I shall feel comfortable doing what I refrain from doing now. I realize I did not refrain from speaking because I did not like to, but because I was afraid I would not speak well. This self-fulfilling prophecy only makes the matter worse: nothing is impossible if one stops denying any possibility. This is the one thing I did not overcome among all the achievements at LHT, and I am ready to admit my cowardliness, step out of my safe zone and face the challenge. I am sure I will become stronger.


PS Been writing this whole passage amid terrible pain in the eye…… Why is there no cure to the pain?

一場誤會



不喜歡廣東流行曲
但有些時候
仔細聽聽歌詞的話