À la recherche du temps perdu

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Month: May, 2006

Amidst the typhoon “Pearl”

Today I was translating another book of my previous boss’ poems. To be honest, I enjoyed the work, and would continue doing it even if he had not offered me that reward. But knowing that I am currently living on that money while remaining unemployed, I felt obliged to do it properly and in good time. I do not know how people would appreciate these poems, I find them very pictureque and to my liking. And there is not much difficulty in translating them into something an English speaker would comprehend – they read Tolkien and they like it, so they are going to like this Chinese fantasy in English. At least that is what I think. There are always difficulties in translating western texts into Chinese and vice versa, yet at the same time there are strange correspondencies as well. If you know a language and its culture well enough, you will distinguish between what is translatable and what is not, what is good translation and what is not.

And suddenly I received a call. It was Joycelyn! Apparently she was concerned how I got on with John and called to ask after me and give me some kind reminders. I am almost ashamed to receive so much kind support from people I have only known for a brief period on the course of my book’s making. Why would you give so much support to a person? Once I asked a hallmate who had given me help when I was in Students’ Association. She told me one needed no reason to offer help. She was a Christian and I knew what she meant. We give support to our friends because we care about them. Christians give support to everyone (theoretically) because they see everyone as their brothers and sisters. But then when I think it over, perhaps it is another kind of fellowship – when you find someone with similar aspirations in life, will you not feel more akin to him or her?

****





今日終於係東張西望見返佢地……真係即刻開心左喎
(阿爸仲讚佢地D廣東話純正……其實佢地好local架)

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今日、環島遊。

今日,像Hong Kong O,不停走來走去做task……

1000 起牀
1200 午飯
1400 銅鑼灣Times Square見出版社
1515 上環見designer
1600 旺角,等酒吧開門
1700 IT Mondena 買Wild Day Out Bar Show入場票
1800 中環Palace IFC買The Da Vinci Code戲票,買不到
1900 回家吃飯
2030 灣仔Hong Kong Art School油畫班
2315 回到家中

發現最慘的不是雙腳,而是八逹通。






每次約會都那麼令人期待

只不過有一點不安而已

其實
對於這幾天這許多突如其來的事
獨自承受的不安
依然震撼
也有一點
是因為何東人的驕傲
而逞強了
還是我真的變強了?
不知何時
開始相信直覺
一旦相信了
就不再恐懼
不再害怕周遭的目光
不再害怕去超越平凡
其實也沒有甚麼
只不過是做自己喜歡相信的事罷了
跟世上很多事一樣
同樣費力氣靠運氣
沒有甚麼離經叛道
也不值得自吹自擂
只不過
有一點不安而已

And suddenly

And suddenly, I lost my job (though officially it was me who resigned, yet in fact it was my boss who asked me to resign for good).

And suddenly, I have time to tend to things I have been putting aside.

And suddenly, I had a chance of meeting someone; and because I no longer needed to work, I was able to attend to the meeting, which very likely was to be one of the major turning points in my life.

And suddenly, everything seems prepared and laid out for me, while one moment before it was still an absolute unknown.

And suddenly, my passions seem to be rekindled.

And suddenly, amid all these big changes and prospects of success, I begin to worry. Whenever I get over-confident with the future, I stumble.

And suddenly, I wish I had someone to share all these emotions of mine.

喂,plagirism喎

發現D細仙成日攞我當年幫I-Day pamphlet寫既文章黎用……早知就收版權啦!咁我就唔使做啦,哈哈…….




我可以放心地跑
因為我知道
閉上眼睛
我們連呼吸都一樣


在還是新人時,球技很遜
常躲在洗手間哭
三年後我站在這球場
只因當天沒有被眼淚打敗

忽然自由

真係講出黎都無人信。
竟然因為太有能力,令到老板覺得留住我會阻礙我發展,所以請我自動辭職,即時生效。
最神奇既係,D同事同我都覺得佢係出自真心(最少有一半係啦,另一半可能係驚我遲早會走)…….
如此這般,老板判左一份差不多有一個月糧既Freelance job俾我,再送我兩本書。今日起,我就無端端唔使再返工……

忽然回復自由身。
時間岩岩好。
果然冥冥中自有主宰。

新發展

我改口。
事情忽然又有新發展。




嘩搞到成點幾先有得瞓……
搏盡呀。

On Intuition.

Today my 2 week-colleague said she had finally decided to leave. Talking, she discovered in the trash my disposed draft. And she suddenly said something to me which sounded very much like a farewell speech. More amusing is that I think I was quite moved by it. It was all by intuition that I told her about my book. And it was much less suspected that she would be interested in it and offered to do the layout design for me. I think I would rather entrust it to her than other good designers my friends are looking out for me – I do not know, it is just my intuition. The meeting was a sign itself and I am a superstitious person in my own way. I tend to see signs and believe in my intuition/first impression. I do not know but when I think of something I tend to have a precise picture of what shape it takes and seldom think of any alternatives even when others think otherwise. Somehow things will turn out different from what I initially think, but then it is always because of the signs and intuitions that happen along the way which guide me through the whole thing. I never think much of Intuition, but now I guess I can count myself as one who is living by intuition, regardless of my rigidity that manifests in all ways. Yes and now I must admit that my rigidity is also prone to intuition, and that no wonder the intuitive SOLER impresses me so much.

I will follow my intuition until the end of this affair. I believe it will guide me through this time, as it has always done before.

老板唔易做

真係老土。阿老板又要請D高學歷既人返黎去協助公司轉型,又要唔捨得出錢;請左返黎又要驚D人會走,又唔捨得用多少少誠意去留住D人材。真係好老土。

又再老土D。阿少爺係自己屋企公司做野,但係又無料;成日行行企企揾野黎做,义隻腳埋D唔關佢事既野度,明明係係度搞緊破壞又無人想聽佢講都仲要扮老細。真係極之老土。

唉。

Not too French, a bit British

Woke up still very tired, but since I bought ticket for Godard’s “Slow Motion” I dragged myself to the cinema.

I will not pretend I fully comprehend and appreciate Godard… Instead I must admit I still cannot quite fathom the French mind. I do not know whether it is the time (1970s) or the French thing, since I had no problem watching Ozon. Anyway.

It occurs to me that almost all literary scholars aspire to (or like to be thought so) French Art, for reasons I do not quite understand – perhaps it is just this incomprehensibility of the French that makes it look sophisticated. For a dull head like mine, I would rather resort to something more comprehensible and yet no less sophisticated. In many ways I prefer the British, though their rigidity drives many people mad. My boss seems to be just this sort who has something against the British which made her behave in a certain manner against a certain British client in a certain occasion, and which made me feel quite uneasy as well.

I do not know. I owe much from the British through history (from Chaucer to Joyce), and I still delight in claiming myself a sister of Jane Austen/Virginia Woolf. Perhaps I will have more French in my blood if I begin to read some French literature…like Les Miserable?